Tuesday, January 18, 2011

What to do on a Sick Day:

1. Lay in bed and weigh all the factors for and against you missing today.  Toss and turn repeatedly because if you are laying on your left side, then your left nostil fills.  Shift to the right, feel all the drainage moving to the right side.  Decide how long you will let this go on.  Get out of bed and feel the room spinning.

2. Call for a substitute.

3. Panic because you left the students' desk in a misshapen form on Friday because you were going to use them like that today and now realize that said students' will never do the reading assignment you left them if their desks are in said arrangement.

4. Call your teacher's aide at 6:45 (after debating for 15 minutes if 6:30 was too early to call) and tell her to have the students move the desks back first thing.

5. Go back to bed.  Thank the Lord repeatedly for teacher's aides.

6. Go to the doctor for Round 2 of antibiotics.  Read 2 issues of People magazine in the waiting room for an embarrassing long amount of time.

7. Go to CVS to have prescription filled.  Manage to spend at least another $25 on various "necessities" for sick day like magazines and new body lotion.

8. Come home and make a smoothie to take with your medication because it says "Take with Food" and it's the only thing you can taste.

9.  Knock the blender over and spill said smoothie all over the kitchen.

10.  Laugh sarcastically and say out loud to the cat who is looking on innocently, "Really?  REALLY?!"

11. Re-make smoothie.  Snuggle with cat who totally understands you and loves you unconditionally.

12.  Make soup for dinner.  Manage to spill an entire bowlful of water on the kitchen floor.

13. Yell at yourself like a crazy person so that your husband thinks you have lost your mind.

14.  Throw in the towel (ha, literally) and clean the entire kitchen.  Then feel really good about getting something done today.  Forbid husband who already thinks you're crazy to walk on the kitchen floor

15. Somewhere in the midst of all of it, finish up the last of your grading so at least you can feel somewhat useful and not so much like a huge whimp for missing school.

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