So the last Bible Study that I participated in was called Humility: True Greatness by C.J. Mahaney. It was such a thought-provoking study and really opened up discussions in our group on exactly is humility and how can we cultivate it in Godly manner so as to grow and humble ourselves before an all-powerful, yet all-loving God. Humility is such a hard thing because no one actually wants to be humbled. No one wants to be laying open and exposed with their faults spread out before them to be corrected and dealt with. It's just not a desirable thing. Yet the Bible continually commands us to be humble:
"With humility comes wisdom." -Proverbs 11:2
"Humility and the fear of the Lord bring wealth and honor and life." -Proverbs 22:4
"When the LORD saw that they humbled themselves, this word of the LORD came to Shemaiah: 'Since they have humbled themselves, I will not destroy them but will soon give them deliverance. My wrath will not be poured out on Jerusalem through Shishak.' " - 2 Chronicles 12:7
"He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way." - Psalm 25:9
The list goes on. Humility is a good thing. It should be a desirable thing. But it hurts so much when it happens to you.
Today at work, I was humbled. I did something I should not have done. I went about asking for something in the wrong way. I really felt like I had not done a terrible thing and really it wasn't the big deal that some had made it out to be. But after praying and really spending some time just laying my thoughts before the throne of the Lord, this thought really came clearly: "Emily, you hurt some people and THAT is the fault. THAT is the sin. You got prideful and did what you wanted without thinking about how it would affect others around you." I heard God asking me: "What is it you're REALLY upset about?" The fact is, I was upset with the system. But I was even more upset and truly embarrassed that I had been called out. I kept saying to God, "I DON'T LIKE TO BE TOLD I'M WRONG! I DON'T LIKE HEARING WHAT I DID WAS A BAD THING." And then I remembered the sweet, sweet verse: "...because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in." (Pro. 3:12)
What amazing love the Lord has for me and for us that he takes the time to correct us. I took the opportunity to change my tone right there and thank God for his unfailing love. For showing today to me (yet again) that through this discipline, he proves his love.
Oh, amazing grace, how sweet the sound...